Negative Experiences

Writers: Devin
Date Posted: 15th March 2025

Characters: Saedyna, R'lor
Description: R’lor brings up an uncomfortable subject with Saedyna.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 1, day 8 of Turn 12
Notes: Content warning for discussion of past abuse and rape.

R'lor

“Please have a seat, Saedyna,” the Weyrlingmaster said. “How’s Avarith?”

Despite her nervousness, the thought of her dragon made her smile.
“She’s doing well. She likes that drills are now more like flying
Thread like the big dragons.” Saedyna tried not to think too much
about the dangers they would face soon. Avarith was worth it, and it
was far better than the life she’d left behind.

“I’m glad to hear it. Both of you are doing well, and I’m proud of
you.” His stomach tightened as he considered how to approach this.
He’d thought long and hard about bringing this up at all. “I want to
discuss an uncomfortable subject with you. I wouldn’t bring it up if I
didn’t think it was important. I know you were married before you were
Searched and that your husband . . . was cruel.” He had half a mind to
go find the man and let Kularth eat him. “I assume you have experience
with sex but I would guess that experience was unpleasant.”

Saedyna opened her mouth but R’lor held up a hand. “I’m not asking for
details, or even a confirmation. If you have had sex, then technically
you’re prepared for Avarith’s flights. But my concern is that if your
experience is negative, you might panic.”

Saedyna felt ill, and she couldn’t help remembering what Koaz had done to her.

}:Who is hurting you?:{ Avarith demanded.

**No one, it’s just a memory. He can’t ever hurt me again.**

R’lor gave her a moment. “I’m very sorry to bring this up, Saedyna.
I’m only worried about you and Avarith. And again, I don’t need any
confirmation or explanation from you. I only want you to consider that
it might be good to have a positive experience of sex before she
rises.”

She’d felt dread at the idea of mating flights. Of having yet another
man force himself on her, even if they said you didn’t really remember
what happened. Her mind would be with Avarith, sharing her pleasure,
and when the flight was over Saedyna could leave. It would be . . .
like a dream maybe.

}:If mating will hurt you then I will not do it!:{ Avarith roared. }:I
would never hurt you!:{

}:Be calm, Avarith.:{ Kularth soothed the young green. }:You will do
what you must, and so will your rider. It will be okay.:{

“If I could spare you all of this, I would,” R’lor said gently and
swallowed against the tightness in his throat. “But I can’t stop
Avarith from rising and I don’t want it to be a source of suffering
for you. No more than it has to be, at least.”

**Don’t worry, don’t worry. I’m fine. You won’t hurt me, I promise.**
She sent love to Avarith. Saedyna had promised herself she wasn’t
going to live in fear anymore, and that was even before she had
Avarith to lean on.

Saedyna took a deep breath and straightened her shoulders. “I’ll do
it. Or . . . think about it at least.” This was something she could
control. Something she could _choose_. She could reclaim sex from
something her husband forced on her to something that could feel good.
Weyrfolk seemed to love it, at least, and they couldn’t _all_ be
wrong. Right?

That brought a small smile to R’lor’s face. “You’re a very strong
woman, Saedyna. I have a lot of admiration for your resilience.”

She blushed at the praise. “Thank you, Weyrlingmaster.” She wanted to
be strong, sometimes she even believed that she was. To hear it from
someone else, from the Weyrlingmaster, made her feel warm.

Now she just had to find a man to have sex with. Ugh.

Last updated on the March 19th 2025

Welcome to Triad Weyrs!

Negative Experiences