A Daunting Dream

Writers: Rochelle
Date Posted: 10th September 2007

Characters: Ariau
Description: Ariau reflects on the Pern-old dream of being a Queenrider.
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 5, day 14 of Turn 4

Ariau may be new to River Bluff Weyr, but it hadn't taken her long to find one of the few spots where people could look into the Hatching Grounds from outside and not be seen by Vilarth. She had no desire to become the target of the ire of a broody queen. She wasn't entirely certain what would happen if she was caught, since egg-peeking seemed to be a Pern-wide sport in the weyrs, but had no desire to find out. She could see most of the sands from her niche in the rock by the entrance, although she couldn't see more than a corner of the mound where the gold egg was.

A queen egg. She'd never seen one before, although as a child she'd dreamed of soaring through the air on the back of the biggest, shiniest gold on Pern. She supposed every little girl did -it certainly had been a common enough dream at the holds and halls she'd visited growing up, even if dragonrider's status had not been terribly high at the time, with Search having just been reinstated and Thread not yet falling.

A dream. She was facing it now. While she had dreamed of Impressing gold, had stood on the Sands at multiple hatchings without golden eggs, she had never really considered the possibility. A golden egg. The possibilities offered by that unseen object were daunting.

To ride a queen... Even now, the dreams conjured images of flashing wings, of people obeying her every whim, of handsome bronzeriders whirling her around dance floors in the finest clothes and calling her beautiful. To ride a queen was to be in charge, to be famous, to know everyone and to have the best of everything.

But she didn't need to be lectured or spend a day with a goldrider to know that wasn't the case. Being in charge wasn't all it was cracked up to be.
She had seen her grandmother under stress too often, been introduced to too many harried holders and exhausted craftmasters to think it would be effortless. She had been left in charge of her younger brothers too often to think it would be easy, or to believe that everyone would like her because of it. As far as she knew, there was nothing different between being a goldrider and being a lady holder other than the large golden dragon. It was a challenge, a set of restrictions that would either make or break you and always prevent you from doing what you wanted, and no matter what you did someone would always be unhappy with you.

She sighed, leaning her head against the rock. She stood for Hatchings because she had been Searched, because to be chosen by a dragon was to become something special and to never be alone. To always have a friend who really knew you. Someone who you would never have to leave behind.

She'd long ago made the decision that she had to offer the dragons their chance to chose her. The idea of refusing to Stand and possibly have the death of some pretty little green unable to find her mate left her cold.
She wasn't willing to risk that, even if it meant she spent the rest of her life fighting Thread. Actually, fighting Thread, even after seeing the scars on riders and hearing the dragons keen after a death at Fort Weyr, didn't seem that terrifying. She'd watched the riders drill, endlessly, for turns now. She knew they did everything to be prepared, and the death toll was nothing now compared to the first few Falls. If you were careful, and followed orders, chances were you would be fine, and so would your dragon and your friends. Fighting Thread was like a chore that needed to be done, and someone had to do it. As the only people with the means, those 'someones' were the dragonriders. Otherwise all the people she had met, all the beautiful places she had seen, all the things that made her love traveling, would be gone. At least if she Impressed, she _knew_ what she would be protecting!

But a queen egg... Queens were different than the speedy little greens she'd been watching and envisioning. More than just bigger and a different color. They were... _more_. Commanding. They could make any dragon listen to them, no matter what their riders said. The queens laid the eggs and ruled the weyrs, and by consequence in their own way, they ruled _Pern_.
To be a queenrider meant responsibility, to always be in charge, without a break. They couldn't just fly Thread and do drills and be done. There was always something else for a queenrider to do.

And yet. The long forgotten dreams were vague and dazzling, stubbornly resisting any effort to be dispelled. Queenriders were so much _more_ than greenriders. They were the ones who had the attention of all, who could command the weyrs. To be a queenrider was a challenge, one that only a few other women on Pern would ever have.
**I'm here if you want me.** She thought in quiet assurance at the golden egg beyond her sight. Through the opening, she caught a glimpse of a golden wing as Vilarth shifted position.

Suddenly nervous and awed at her audacity, and wondering if Vilarth might have heard her, Ariau pushed herself off the wall and backed away from the entrance. **I'm here if any of you want me.** She added hastily, feeling the color rush to her face and increasingly ridiculous. What was she expecting? For one of the eggs to answer? The Hatching was sevendays away!

More gold became visible now -the queen was moving. Her blush ringing in her ears and fear of what might happen if she was caught peeking overriding the reasonable part of her mind saying that Vilarth was just checking the other eggs, she turned and fled

Last updated on the September 13th 2007

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A Daunting Dream