You Don't Understand

Writers: AL, Eimi
Date Posted: 30th July 2008

Characters: M'galec, Ivane
Description: M'galec and Ivane have a heated discussion and Ivane is punished.
Location: River Bluff Weyr
Date: month 11, day 2 of Turn 4

Jilith. She was so wonderful. She was the smartest, most beautiful
dragon in all the weyr. Oh how Ivane loved her! Not that she didn't
love her husband...well, she supposed he wasn't her husband any longer.
No, but she would have him as her weyrmate. She did love Kailatan and
Kailvan, loved them dearly, but Jilith...Jilith was a part of her in a
way that neither of them ever could be. It was like Ivane had been
only half a person before her dragon had hatched and completed her.

Oh how she missed her love and her child! She missed them dearly.
Ivane would never give up her lifemate, but that didn't mean that
things were easy. It was odd waking up in a bed without Kailatan. It
was strange not seeing her son's face when she woke in the morning and
singing songs to him at night. The last couple of sevendays had flown
by, but she still ached for her family in a way. She wanted to spend
time with them, but Jilith was constantly hungry, or itchy, and there
were so many things that she had to learn as a new dragonrider!

"Weyrling, this is no time to daydream," the Weyrlingmaster's second
frowned, standing over the greenrider's desk. "As you can see, half of
your classmates have already finished and have been dismissed. You
have barely started!"

"Oh..." Ivane looked around to see that the Second was right. The
room looked awfully empty with so many good. She flushed and looked
down. "Sorry sir I was just...thinking."

"Were you thinking about your assignment?" he asked innocently, though
he knew full well she had not.

Ivane slowly shook her head. "No sir. I was...I was thinking about my
family."

"Well, I am sure even your parents would agree it is far more important
for you to know the Weyr's chain of command than it is for you to be
dallying away your time dreaming of them, especially when you have a
hungry dragonet to feed."

"I wasn't thinking of my parents." Didn't he know anything about her?
She supposed not. After all, there were quite a few weyrlings to
teach. "I have a husband and a son. I was thinking of them."

While that certainly made her weyrling training that much harder, it
was time she faced the reality of the situation. "You are a weyrling
now. You cannot change that, nor would you want to. But how long are
you going to dwell on your former life? You have a dragonet who is
counting on you to be thinking of the here and now."

"I would never ignore Jilith!" Ivane flushed, partially out of
embarrassment, but mostly out of annoyance that he would think she
would do just that to her lifemate. She looked up, her eyes meeting
his dead on. "Did you have a family before you impressed, sir? A
wife? A son or daughter?"

"No," he said with a shake of his head.

She didn't think so. "Then you don't know what it's like." Ivane
sighed and looked down. "I'm using to putting my son down to bed every
night, to having my husband in bed by my side. I'd never trade Jilith
for anything, but I am trying to get used to more changes than just
having her. I'm not trying to ignore you or her, I'm just..."

"You are just wasting your time and my time and everyone else's time
thinking about a life that is no longer. Do not for one moment suppose
you have it worse than anyone else. Your family is here. How many of
your Clutchmates left everything they ever knew behind?" He was not
going to allow any of his weyrlings to wallow in self-pity. They all
had to adjust, just as he had. "In four months, you will have all that
back, but for now, you need to concentrate on your new life. Your
life, and the life of your dragon, depends on that."

Ivane's head snapped up and she stood, leaning on the table, her eyes
flashing. "You have no idea. You've never had to adjust to anything
like this. You didn't have a family, a wife and a child. You make it
sound like I'm a horrible person for missing my family!"

"Sit down!" The Weyrlingmaster Second roared, looming over her. "Who
do you think you are talking to, weyrling?!"

She had done it. She had lost her cool and she was going to be in big
trouble. Only, Ivane wasn't about to back down just yet. "Obviously
to someone who doesn't understand!"

M'galec's eyes narrowed and his voice lowered to a dangerously low
tone. There was always one. "No! I understand the situation
perfectly. I think _you_ are the one who does not understand,
weyrling. You are the kind of weyrling that can endanger yourself,
your dragon and everyone around you. You had better get it through
your thick skull that your ass now belongs to the Weyr, not your
family, and I will always, _always_ outrank you! And now, rather than
spend your free time tonight and tomorrow with your family, you will
spend it instead mucking out the dragon infirmary where you can
observe first hand exactly what can happen when you spend your time
day dreaming instead of keeping your mind on the task at hand. Do you
understand _that_, Weyrling Ivane?" --

Ivane had to bite her tongue to keep from snapping back a retort. She
lowered herself back into her chair, eyes flaming at the Weyrlingmaster
Second. Had she been a dragon, he would have been nothing but charred
dust. The man had no heart, no heart at all.

At least she was smart enough to back down. She could be taught after
all. He didn't care of the weyrling liked him or agreed with him, but
she _would_ respect him. "Now get your work done. You have a hungry
dragon waiting on you and the days not half done."

The girl wanted to snap back at him. She wanted to claw at his face and
beat him senseless, but she didn't say a word. Ivane wasn't going to
forget how he had treated her, or what he had said. He didn't
understand and it was obvious he never would. A man like that
shouldn't be teaching weyrlings, people whose lives were changing and
maybe who were having trouble adjusting. She would never have done
that. And she _would_ see her family that day, even if it meant being
late to bed. He wasn't going to keep her from them. She'd never
neglect Jilith, but she didn't want to neglect her family either!

Last updated on the July 30th 2008

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You Don't Understand