Enough
Dragonsfall Weyr
Amber Hills Hold
Vintner Hall
Healer Hall
Hidden Meadows
Dolphin Cove Weyr
Dolphin Hall
Emerald Falls Hold
Harper Hall
Printer Hall
Green Valley Hold
Leeward Lagoon Hold
Barrier Lake Weyr
Sunstone Seahold
Citrus Bay Hold
Writers: Clancey
Date Posted: 8th November 2005
Characters: J'darin
Description: A look into J'darin's thoughts on what being Weyrleader means.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 8, day 26 of Turn 3
Another sunset over the waters of Dolphin Cove saw the still relatively new Weyrleader out at the beach with Hasaarth. His dragon was soaking up the last of the sun's heat from the sand before they returned to their Weyr, and his rider was alone. He usually was, these days. Every day before this too, his conscience reminded him. The odd part of the picture was that he faced the Weyr, not the sea. So many lives in his keeping. So many riders depended on his ability to make the right decisions, choose the right patterns. }: In OUR keeping and OUR ability :{ Hasaarth reminded him sleepily, but seriously. It also served as a rebuke to the bronzerider that he was _not_ alone. Still, all of their lives were tied together by this one little thread -
a gold dragon Rising to mate and choosing one particular bronze out of all her pursuers. Was _this_ how they defended Pern? Was this the best way? Were they the best choices?
}: The queens always know, rider mine. They _always_ know. :{ Taking a little comfort from this, yet still lost in thought, he sank into the sand, and leaned against a bronze flank to gaze out at the evening hustle and bustle of a Weyr. Riders were coming back to duty at last, many of them, though some remained on light duty and a few more were still grounded completely. He couldn't escape the idea that he and Hasaarth were the right choice at the right time for this Weyr in Crisis, yet if that was so, why did he feel like such a failure? Very little had changed or seemed to change, though the riders were growing more confident in his abilities with each Fall. Confidence in himself had never really been much of a problem for either J'darin or his dragon, but it was harder to find others who shared the same confidence in his dragon and himself that the man himself bore. Three falls he'd flown now, leading the Wings. A few minor scorings, one fairly bad, and one with no injuries at all. Was it something to be proud of? He didn't know. Early on, he'd tried talking to some of the riders, and met the same response he had always gotten as Weyrlingmaster Second. Nods of agreement. Nothing more, nothing less. It was odd, how being in charge made you much more careful of riders and their feelings. He wanted to care for them all now. Even blueriders and male greenriders! Hasaarth crooned from behind him, sensing a great deal of the inner battle going on inside the man he had chosen that day on the Sands. Had it only been 15 turns ago?
Ahh well. Leadership, it seemed, was quite lonely sometimes. Even his Weyrwoman wanted very little to do with him, outside of running the Weyr. He thought, privately, that he and Hasaarth were doing a very good job as Weyrleaders. But why didn't it show? T'moran had had respect and loyalty. Had he had friends too? Did you give up one for the other, and had J'darin been wrong all these years?
With a faint sigh, he turned to Hasaarth. With a dragon like his, what need had he of friends?
A moment later, scolding and chattering for all he was worth, J'darin's little brown flit, Oak, popped out of /between/ above his head. Again, the bronzerider was reminded rather guiltily that he was not alone, and sinking in self-pity was no way to run a Weyr. Chuckling to himself, he summoned all the old arrogance and pride that had been stripped away by seeing what could happen in a Threadfall gone wrong, and further by the accident of a goldrider's whimsy and her dragon's choice for a mate, J'darin got to his feet with new resolve hardening his heart and his mind. }: We are the best. You are the best! I am here, Oak is here. We are together. :{ came crashing across his mind over and over from his beloved Hasaarth, and even Oak was crooning along with the great bronze, wrapped around his forearm tightly.
**Yes, we are together.** he sent to both of them, and for now he decided it was enough.
Last updated on the November 9th 2005