Bitter Sweet

Writers: Eimi, Rochelle
Date Posted: 30th November 2009

Characters: B'ram, Eleada
Description: B'ram encounters a former lover in the lunch line, and he and Eleada attempt an awkward conversation.
Location: Dolphin Cove Weyr
Date: month 6, day 5 of Turn 5

B'ram

B'ram was whistling a rather naughty little tune as he stepped into the lunch line, feeling rather good about his day. He smiled as the woman in front of him turned to look at him. Though it took a little effort, his smile only faltered slightly when he recognized her. "Good afternoon, Eleada."

Eleada felt her shoulders tense when she realized who the familiar whistler was. Too Familiar. She gave him a tight little smile and a light nod, trying to be casual. "B'ram. How's Girifith?"

"Well, thank you." They shuffled awkwardly forward a couple steps. "And Gliorith?"

"She's fine." The wingthird answered automatically, then paused. What was she supposed to say? Even though she'd spotted their breakup from miles away, even though she couldn't blame him for leaving her and had let him go freely, it still hurt. She'd let him into her bed knowing the risks, but hadn't quite figured out how to get him out of her heart once he'd left her furs for the weyrwoman.

B'ram also had regrets about the way their affair had ended, and they flooded back now as he saw how very... cold... they were being. But if their positions had been reversed, would he have been as polite as she was now? Or would he have treated her like he had Atreyn when she broke his heart. The fact that she was trying to take the higher road just made him feel even lower. When he had entered their relationship, he had done so with the hope that she could save him from his twisted relationship with Trae. In the end he gave himself fully over to it, and though he didn't regret his decision, he hated himself for having hurt Eleada. And he could see the hurt in the way she treated him. Shards, he wanted to be her friend. He wanted her forgiveness. "I saw Adaric the other day," he said, trying to keep them on safe ground, but also trying desperately to reconnect with her.

"Really? Where?" She hadn't seen her sons in a few days because of wing matters, but had already arranged with her mother -her sons' foster mother- to take them to dinner tonight. B'ram had always seemed to get along okay with her boys, even if she wasn't sure whether it was out of genuine affection or to keep on good terms with her, and Adaric had certainly been doing more on his own. He'd announced solemnly that he was going to Stand on his birthingday, and at the encouragement of his family was starting to look into the different crafts. Even his father, D'ric, had started to take all three of her boys to different crafthalls on his occasional visits. "It seems like every time I see him he's found some new part of the weyr to be excited about."

"Just down at the beach." B'ram hadn't been looking for him, but when he had brought Girifith down for his bath, the boy had been there. "He's getting tall."

"He is, isn't he." She said wistfully, remembering the first time she'd brought her most serious son to the beach. He'd barely been a month old. And now he was nearly to her shoulder... she swallowed, and forced another smile. "He's planning on Standing for the next Hatching too."

"Already?" he asked, genuinely surprised. "Shards, he really is getting big, isn't he." The brownrider smiled as he remembered one of the picnics he had gone on with her and her boys. One happy family... "I bet they all are now, aren't they."

"Yeah, they are." She agreed, thinking of the twins. "Eleaxol's finally caught up to his brother, although I think Eleadan's going to shoot up again soon. They're both already nearly to my shoulders."

The brownrider smiled as they shuffled another couple steps forward. They had covered all their safe topics - the dragons, the children. If the weather were a bit more variable at Dolphin Cove they could cover that before running out of things to say. "So... How have you been?"

Oh shards... How was she supposed to answer that one? Hhe'd already used up her pleasantry-type answer, and she knew another 'fine' was not what B'ram was looking for. But what was the alternative? I miss you an having you in my bed and I wish you hadn't left me for the Weyrwoman?

"Um." She answered intelligently. "I'm just fine. I've been pretty busy with the wing lately. You?"

"Pretty busy," he nodded, though he didn't want to elaborate too much on what had taken most of his time. "I have found time to work out with the guys. We're thinking of challenging another Weyr at a wrestling match soon. If the Weyrleaders will agree, though they might not be too happy about the risk of injury."

"A wrestling match?" Eleada repeated, then frowned. "Honestly, I'm not too sure about that one either, B'ram. It could be a lot of fun, but we get enough people injuring themselves tossing firestone sacks without adding wrestling on top of it."

"Is that the Wingthird talking?" B'ram asked, finding his smile even more forced. Shards, she wasn't his lover any more. He was just trying to make conversation, not ask for permission.

"Yes." She grimaced. Shards, had she really said that? Pretty soon she was wasn't going to wan to be around herself anymore! "Sorry. I know I sound like a wet blanket. I've just been dealing with an idiot who threw his back out twice in the last sevenday because he was trying to show off his weight lifting skills."

"Ah, well, I like to think I'm a little smarter than that. But I have to keep in shape somehow." B'ram had always taken pride in his body. And he had rather thought Eleada had liked it too.

"Yes." Her smile was genuine, if small and somewhat sad. "You were always pretty good at that stuff. I always liked watching you."

Now it was his turn to smile bittersweetly. He had liked being watched. B'ram had liked many things about Eleada. But that was a long time ago now. "I always thought the twins were natural wrestlers. If they ever have an interest..." He trailed off, wondering if she might take the offer as more than he had intended.

"I don't think Eleaxol would do well as a wrestler. He's really not that aggressive. But Eleadan has the ambition, and they're both pretty active." She mused.

"Well, you know, there are some youths who are already practicing. Just the basics, of course, but it's something to keep their time occupied other than wandering the Halls." Weyrbrats with too much time on their hands could get into all sorts of mischief.

"If my mother has her way, I don't think any of them will ever have the chance." Eleada said dryly. "She's already raised one batch of dragonriders, and the grandchildren haven't managed to come up with anything that we didn't try at some point."

"Believe me, they find a way. I know I did." B'ram had certainly been the source of mischief more than once.

"So did I." Eleada smiled at the memory, her expression saddening a little as she remembered many conversations with B'ram on this very topic. "Which is why I'm still not allowed into the kitchens, you'll remember."

"Yes," he nodded, remembering that conversation as they were curled up in each others arms. "I remember."

She swallowed, wishing that she dared follow that line of conversation further, but it brought with it too many memories of warm bodies and someone to cuddle with beneath her furs, something she couldn't afford to risk any more. Even if she had broken the rule for B'ram after a long abstinence. "And speaking of food, it looks like we're almost there." She said lightly as the line shuffled forward a few more steps. "I wonder what they're serving?"

He shuffled forward. "My marks are on meat rolls and bubbly pies."

"Roast wherry sandwiches." She suggested after sniffing the smell of meat in the air appreciatively. "And some wildberry cobbler maybe? Or... it could be stew." She admitted, trying hard not to think about their first meeting so long ago.

"Do you find the two confusing? Wildberry cobbler and stew?" he asked, showing a bit more humor to try to make things easier.

She swatted him lightly, the way she would have back when they were together, before she could catch herself. But she kept the easy grin that rose to her lips as she answered simply. "Only when I want something sweet for dinner."

Last updated on the December 1st 2009

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Bitter Sweet